“But if they cannot contain, let them marry: for it is better to marry than to burn. The wife is bound by the law as long as her husband liveth; but if her husband be dead, she is at liberty to be married to whom she will; only in the Lord.” (1 Corinthians 7:9, 39 KJV)
When it comes to marriage, the New Testament church is clear on the subject. The only person you cannot marry is someone outside the faith. You are at liberty to marry whosoever you will. You know however that the Bible frowns on homosexuality, incest, polygamy, divorce, and bestiality, etc. The Scripture recommend heterosexual marital relationship between two consenting adults. My understanding of the Scriptures show that God does not endorse pedophilia either.
This teaching is only offering some basic and useful guidance to women on how to assess any suitor.
If you are a christian and a child of God, then marriage and a good marriage is a heritage reserved for you. If a guy is proposing marriage, what are some of the things you look out for in him? These things also help men to assess their readiness for marriage;
- Is he a Christian?
- Is he truely single?
- Is he matured enough to leave his mother and father, to cleave to his wife?
- Does he have employable skills?
- Does he recognise you as a counterpart meet (fit) for him?
- Would you be willing to submit to this man as your lord?
- Does he have a home?
Is he a Christian?
Being a christian is not a status, it is a nature. A Christian has the nature of Christ. A Christian looks like Christ. The following are some things Christ did, and therefore what every true Christian does;
- Christ did nothing, except what he sees the Father doing (John 5:19)
- Christ prayed every morning before day break (Mark 1:35)
- Christ had a habit of going to the synagogue every meeting time in every city he traveled to (Luke 4:16)
- Christ shared the good news with others he met.
- Christ was gentle and meek.
Does the gentleman have this nature? Christ fulfilled all righteousness; would your guy fulfill all righteousness in relating with you, down to marrying you?
Is he truly single?
The will of God is for you to have your own husband or your own wife. God hates adultery and fornication. God wants each one of His children to marry their own spouses. So be sure that he is truly single, and you should be too.
Don’t allow anyone to deceive you into thinking that he is single when in fact, he is not. He must be truly single before he can be a suitor. If he is divorced, make sure you do your background checks well.
Is he matured enough to leave mother and father, to cleave to me as his wife?
The scriptures teach that a man should leave his mother and father, and cleave to his wife (Genesis 2:24) The man must be ready to leave and cleave. Marriage is for men and not for boys. Immaturity is a big problem in relationships. May the Lord help you to find a matured man.
Does he have employable skills?
One of the foremost responsibilities of a husband is to provide for his home. He must therefore have employable skills.
Does he recognise me as a counterpart meet for him?
Until a man recognises you as a counterpart meet for him, he will not treat you well. Until a man recognises you as his counterpart, he will not honour or respect you. Only accept the proposal of a man who accepts you as a mate meet for him.
Am I willing to submit to this man as my lord?
This is one of your foremost responsibilities. As a wife, you will submit to the man whose proposal you accept; who becomes your husband. Be sure you are willing to submit to him as lord.
Does he have a home?
Every man worth his sort must have a place called home. Even nomads have a home. Adam had a home with four water points before meeting Eve. There should be a place he calls home.
In conclusion, let me say that there is no need at all to rush with some of these decisions. Always remember that the most fundamental condition for accepting a suitor is whether he has the nature of Christ or not. A man who has the nature of Christ is a great asset.
I love you, stay blessed!
Great and advisable piece,may God uplift his oil on you in Jesus name. Amen!!!